Quote-fishin #32

Make sure You learn from your mistakes.

And don't repeat them.

the Source

as it doesn`t always work out, it is even more appreciated, when achieved.

comin out from within, draw from inside, 

hookin up with your best self and feel content. 

i shouldnt ask myself where is it comin from, but I did. cause it makes sence. and I just love the feeling when it does ;) on a daily basis there is just so many sutiations, where I have to be satisfied with : where is this comin from.. a retorical question to myself, remaining unanswered. 

so, it’s all part of the Master Plan? or is it all a consequence of many decisions, great and small, made throughout the Lifetime? 

the sky is slowly, slowly clearin out. looking for aprooval wil be this girls forever journey. but then, she gets disappointed as her expectations dont fullfill. such an obvious outcome of a "dream never realy come true" story. 

should one just put a board around his neck? sayin "I want you to tell me I am good at tenis, so I can be happy at all times" . people would tell you what u wanted to hear and you would be happy. 

seriously?

je ne pense pa. 

as often as I do that, I dont believe we are made to please others. i am one fortunate kiddo, have made it to 30s with quite some best decisions, which all led to a happy day like this one. is just one of 365 days in the year, and is a good one. cause it is a consequence of the days before this one, and the future ones look promisin because of today. you know what i mean? 

look at a blooming apple tree. the sun is shinin on a warm day in the month of may, and the hard working bees are doin their best to pic up the best of nectar to bring to their hives. whithby they fertilise the tree and you can look forward to a fruity autumn, to pick those apples up and keep them in stock throughout the winter. 

 I knew I still had it ;) 

inspired by music and a certain ted-talk about how much is enough, i am sat down on the floor, next to small fire, embraced by the smell of fresh pie i just took out of the oven. grateful for the apples, and grandma who insisted on me being the girl who should cook. 

and smillin at this fact: 

great things come out of gratitude. 

¨¨polno udejanjanje¨¨

 "Kljub vsej nesnagi in žalosti, kljub vsem izničenim sanjam, je svet vendarle čudovit."             (Desiderata, 1692)

kot da bi nekaj izpolnilo manjkajoči del, se kompleksne Misli vedno redkeje pojavijo.
    še vedno in zavedno iščem pomen besedil v pesmih in se vživim v čustva, ki jih izvajalec podaja. redko katera ljuba pesem se mi izmuzne ;) tako se naježim večkrat na dan, "t-di pa t-di" očesu uide kakšna solza. ker je lepo. obožujem večere tople svetlobe, ko me Rep pelje en krog. prav ona je tista, ki je upočasnila moj ritem ob koncu dneva, da se lahko naužijem vonja in barv Narave.

kako zelo zapleteno je, da živo bitje izpolni svoj namen?

čudovito je opazovati žar v očeh zadovoljnega človeka. ne gre brez interakcije, brez odnosov. tako zgodbam o zadovoljnih samotarjih kar težko verjamem. živim za "povratno informacijo". pa naj bo to vrnjen nasmešek, topel pogled, poslano sporočilo ali pa učinkovitost dela. če bi se zares osredotočili le na "self-love" in "self-care", si predstavlam čustveno izumrtje. pa naj se najde še kdo, ki bi mi skušal dopovedati, da čustva v posel ne sodijo. težko verjamem tudi tem. res je "dražje", če ti je bolj mar kot ne, hkrati pa je Srce vedno na pravem mestu. če si priznamo, se odgovor "ker mi je všeč!" zares velikokrat postavi za vprašanjem "zakaj pa?" 

ne pomnim, da bi kdaj preštudirala katero strokovno literaturo na to temo, pa bi jo morda lahko. bolj malo Razuma, več Srca. ker ... kako že? Razum včasih ne razume. 

pri-orities

 "so I guess this could be called Evolution, no?"

you have those hundred phone calls in a day, hundred rings related to daily routine occasions, hundred messages on hundred different applications. and you have that ONE call or ONE message.

the Beauty of Life keeps opening up to me. i have read a few times already - it is the grateful people who are happy, and not the other way around (first happy, then grateful). i cant recall being taught to express gratitude to siblings or relatives, friends or classmates literally. but i do recall growing up in a modest environment, where one creates a lot with his own hands, appreciates it and hopes for others to see the value of the effort as well. quite basic, no? even a baby is happy to show his mommy how he can use the toilet instead of a diaper, a daughter will bake daddys favourite cookies, wait for his first bite and hope for a smile; a student will shout of joy to tell the parents what a great mark he got on his project, the man will whisper to his dad he proposed to a beautiful girl to marry him and this girl wont be able to wait for 3 months to tell her best friend that they are expecting a baby. and then this baby ... so another round of Life begins ... we are not "discovering warm watter", we are just another generation of settlers! explains as well how our focus changes with age. as Relationships are the most important thing in my Life, i should choose very carefully who i get involved with. am i the one that gets to choose? as soon as i get the scent of control under my nose, i get the slap on my face as a gentle reminder "hey, just so you know, you dont get to control things around here, ok?!"
  i could admit, Life is laughing at me.
so be it. i still get to choose, though, how to spare my Time. when you think you got smart in organizing, you can always get wiser. as we cant tell which our last breath will be, the Time given should be spent well.
  did i like a pair of working hands since i was little? did i like dedicated people? did i appreciate the feeling of a tired body in the evening which will tell me i did something today? was i aware of the fact my dog can "read" my mood? indeed, the Beauty is in the proces. how one slowly gets to know all the small things Life has figured out about us... well, not all. my grandma would tell me "one gets to learn all Life, but yet dies as a dummy".
i am grateful for another discovery. how priorities in Life change, to help me focus on the basic, realy important needs.

MAI DOST !!!

po-trpeti

ne pozabim Žabici, kako nas je mirila med poukom. nikoli z visokim tonom, različne gestikulacije so imele vedno močnejši učinek, kadar so nam besede uhajale izpod nadzora in so nam jeziki razum prehitevali. še kdaj bi šla k njej v klop sedet ...
kako pa se naučiš zadržati misel? na zaslonih v filmu/seriji pravijo "Hold your thought!". lažje bi bilo imeti misli v vreči (morda v culi na rami? :) ), jo odpreti in ujeti misli, ki bi silile na plano. naše "male sive celice" jih snujejo na stotine in te proizvodnje ne gre kar tako motiti! pa vendar, ne živim na samotnem otoku, moji sogovorniki so bolj zgovorni kot Wilson v Brodolomu. pa še - ne govorimo vedno istega jezika. 

trpéti -ím nedov., tudi tŕpel; trpljèn (ẹ́ í) 

1. 1. čutiti hude telesne ali duševne bolečine, neugodje: bolnik trpi; zaradi poškodbe trpi že več let; potrpežljivo, vdano trpeti / trpeti zaradi občutka manjvrednosti, zapuščenosti; ob spominu nanj je zelo trpela; trpeti po nedolžnem / duševno, telesno trpeti / preh. trpeti bolečine
2. 2. preh. biti deležen kakega negativnega, neugodnega telesnega, gmotnega stanja: trpeti lakoto, pomanjkanje, revščino
3. 3. biti deležen neugodnega družbenega položaja: trpeti pod tujo oblastjo; stoletja so trpeli v suženjstvu
   // biti deležen česa negativnega, neugodnega sploh: trpeti izgubo, škodo; trpeti krivico; dolgo je trpela zasmehovanje / star. stroške trpi lastnik sam plača, poravna

zadržati misel, kadar ta visi na konici jezika in vrešči, da se bo ravnokar zavihtela proti sogovorniku, je "trpljenje". in kadar se misel izmuzne potrditvi, da sme zbežati proti ušesom sogovornika, je lahko prepozno. podobno kot zamujena priložnost, se tudi izgovorjena beseda "ne vrne nobena". pa smo spet tam - male sive celice sprejmejo, predelajo in ustvarijo vtis/odtis/pečat. eden čarov pogovora je tudi ta, da lahko svoje izrečene misli razlagamo in utemeljujemo v nedogled. če le imamo sogovornika. 
ni vedno lahko, držati jezik za zobmi, ko ti nešteto svežih misli skače po glavi in kriči Zdaj! Zdaj! Zdaj!

kar lepo v vrsto, ena po ena ... 

*Pain

"čisto enostavno je!", je vedno trdila. zvedavih oči sem sledila gibom njenih rok in si le stežka predstavljala, kako bi se obnašale moje roke z moko ... danes vedno mesiva skupaj. 
 nasmiham se spominom. nasmiham se hlebčku, ki vzhaja ob peči. nasmiham se vonju iz peči, diši skoraj kot takrat.
 in kako je Babi vedla? 

The power of Mind is a hard thing to handle. 

tako lahko neham verjeti, da gre osel enkrat na led. ko usmeriš misli in trud v zastavljen cilj, le redko uspeš ob prvem poizkusu. držiš se Pavčkovega "vnovič, in zopet, in znova.", ker ima prav. ko prepiham misli se ustrašim, da misli o neuspehu ne prinesejo uspeha. če verjamem v okusen kruhek, bom testo med prsti gnetla s pravim občutkom, hleb bo vzhajal na toplem, pri zaprtih vratih, in peč bo ravno prav vroča. vse jasno. ampak! kako naj nekaj tako fizikalnega kot je peč primerjam z nečim tako ne-samo-fizikalnim, kot je oseba? peč lahko jaz pripravim za kruh, osebe ne gre "pripraviti na osebo"?  oddahnem si, globoko vdihnem in se pomirim. vse je uredu in kot mora biti. "danes mislim samo pozitivne misli..." (DD)
  Babi je nič-kolikokrat odmerila moko, sol, vodo, kvas. nič-kolikokrat je testo žvižgalo med njenimi zgubanimi rokami. in nič-kolikokrat je imel njen kruh božanski okus. po letih izkušenj je vedno bolj zaupala občutku. ko otrok preizkuša moč svojih nog za prve korake, gotovo ni prepričan , da mu bo uspelo prehoditi pot med mamo in očetom. vendar poizkusi, vnovič in zopet in znova. ko nekoga na novo spoznaš, nisi prepričan, da si spoznal sogovornika, vendar poizkusiš. in dokler nič-kolikokrat ne poizkusiš, ne moreš enostavno zaupati. 

Quote-fishin #31

Odpri raje Srce namesto oči. Že MaliPrinc ve, da je bistvo očem skrito.