Quote-fishin #32

Make sure You learn from your mistakes.

And don't repeat them.

the Source

as it doesn`t always work out, it is even more appreciated, when achieved.

comin out from within, draw from inside, 

hookin up with your best self and feel content. 

i shouldnt ask myself where is it comin from, but I did. cause it makes sence. and I just love the feeling when it does ;) on a daily basis there is just so many sutiations, where I have to be satisfied with : where is this comin from.. a retorical question to myself, remaining unanswered. 

so, it’s all part of the Master Plan? or is it all a consequence of many decisions, great and small, made throughout the Lifetime? 

the sky is slowly, slowly clearin out. looking for aprooval wil be this girls forever journey. but then, she gets disappointed as her expectations dont fullfill. such an obvious outcome of a "dream never realy come true" story. 

should one just put a board around his neck? sayin "I want you to tell me I am good at tenis, so I can be happy at all times" . people would tell you what u wanted to hear and you would be happy. 

seriously?

je ne pense pa. 

as often as I do that, I dont believe we are made to please others. i am one fortunate kiddo, have made it to 30s with quite some best decisions, which all led to a happy day like this one. is just one of 365 days in the year, and is a good one. cause it is a consequence of the days before this one, and the future ones look promisin because of today. you know what i mean? 

look at a blooming apple tree. the sun is shinin on a warm day in the month of may, and the hard working bees are doin their best to pic up the best of nectar to bring to their hives. whithby they fertilise the tree and you can look forward to a fruity autumn, to pick those apples up and keep them in stock throughout the winter. 

 I knew I still had it ;) 

inspired by music and a certain ted-talk about how much is enough, i am sat down on the floor, next to small fire, embraced by the smell of fresh pie i just took out of the oven. grateful for the apples, and grandma who insisted on me being the girl who should cook. 

and smillin at this fact: 

great things come out of gratitude. 

¨¨polno udejanjanje¨¨

 "Kljub vsej nesnagi in žalosti, kljub vsem izničenim sanjam, je svet vendarle čudovit."             (Desiderata, 1692)

kot da bi nekaj izpolnilo manjkajoči del, se kompleksne Misli vedno redkeje pojavijo.
    še vedno in zavedno iščem pomen besedil v pesmih in se vživim v čustva, ki jih izvajalec podaja. redko katera ljuba pesem se mi izmuzne ;) tako se naježim večkrat na dan, "t-di pa t-di" očesu uide kakšna solza. ker je lepo. obožujem večere tople svetlobe, ko me Rep pelje en krog. prav ona je tista, ki je upočasnila moj ritem ob koncu dneva, da se lahko naužijem vonja in barv Narave.

kako zelo zapleteno je, da živo bitje izpolni svoj namen?

čudovito je opazovati žar v očeh zadovoljnega človeka. ne gre brez interakcije, brez odnosov. tako zgodbam o zadovoljnih samotarjih kar težko verjamem. živim za "povratno informacijo". pa naj bo to vrnjen nasmešek, topel pogled, poslano sporočilo ali pa učinkovitost dela. če bi se zares osredotočili le na "self-love" in "self-care", si predstavlam čustveno izumrtje. pa naj se najde še kdo, ki bi mi skušal dopovedati, da čustva v posel ne sodijo. težko verjamem tudi tem. res je "dražje", če ti je bolj mar kot ne, hkrati pa je Srce vedno na pravem mestu. če si priznamo, se odgovor "ker mi je všeč!" zares velikokrat postavi za vprašanjem "zakaj pa?" 

ne pomnim, da bi kdaj preštudirala katero strokovno literaturo na to temo, pa bi jo morda lahko. bolj malo Razuma, več Srca. ker ... kako že? Razum včasih ne razume. 

pri-orities

 "so I guess this could be called Evolution, no?"

you have those hundred phone calls in a day, hundred rings related to daily routine occasions, hundred messages on hundred different applications. and you have that ONE call or ONE message.

the Beauty of Life keeps opening up to me. i have read a few times already - it is the grateful people who are happy, and not the other way around (first happy, then grateful). i cant recall being taught to express gratitude to siblings or relatives, friends or classmates literally. but i do recall growing up in a modest environment, where one creates a lot with his own hands, appreciates it and hopes for others to see the value of the effort as well. quite basic, no? even a baby is happy to show his mommy how he can use the toilet instead of a diaper, a daughter will bake daddys favourite cookies, wait for his first bite and hope for a smile; a student will shout of joy to tell the parents what a great mark he got on his project, the man will whisper to his dad he proposed to a beautiful girl to marry him and this girl wont be able to wait for 3 months to tell her best friend that they are expecting a baby. and then this baby ... so another round of Life begins ... we are not "discovering warm watter", we are just another generation of settlers! explains as well how our focus changes with age. as Relationships are the most important thing in my Life, i should choose very carefully who i get involved with. am i the one that gets to choose? as soon as i get the scent of control under my nose, i get the slap on my face as a gentle reminder "hey, just so you know, you dont get to control things around here, ok?!"
  i could admit, Life is laughing at me.
so be it. i still get to choose, though, how to spare my Time. when you think you got smart in organizing, you can always get wiser. as we cant tell which our last breath will be, the Time given should be spent well.
  did i like a pair of working hands since i was little? did i like dedicated people? did i appreciate the feeling of a tired body in the evening which will tell me i did something today? was i aware of the fact my dog can "read" my mood? indeed, the Beauty is in the proces. how one slowly gets to know all the small things Life has figured out about us... well, not all. my grandma would tell me "one gets to learn all Life, but yet dies as a dummy".
i am grateful for another discovery. how priorities in Life change, to help me focus on the basic, realy important needs.

MAI DOST !!!

po-trpeti

ne pozabim Žabici, kako nas je mirila med poukom. nikoli z visokim tonom, različne gestikulacije so imele vedno močnejši učinek, kadar so nam besede uhajale izpod nadzora in so nam jeziki razum prehitevali. še kdaj bi šla k njej v klop sedet ...
kako pa se naučiš zadržati misel? na zaslonih v filmu/seriji pravijo "Hold your thought!". lažje bi bilo imeti misli v vreči (morda v culi na rami? :) ), jo odpreti in ujeti misli, ki bi silile na plano. naše "male sive celice" jih snujejo na stotine in te proizvodnje ne gre kar tako motiti! pa vendar, ne živim na samotnem otoku, moji sogovorniki so bolj zgovorni kot Wilson v Brodolomu. pa še - ne govorimo vedno istega jezika. 

trpéti -ím nedov., tudi tŕpel; trpljèn (ẹ́ í) 

1. 1. čutiti hude telesne ali duševne bolečine, neugodje: bolnik trpi; zaradi poškodbe trpi že več let; potrpežljivo, vdano trpeti / trpeti zaradi občutka manjvrednosti, zapuščenosti; ob spominu nanj je zelo trpela; trpeti po nedolžnem / duševno, telesno trpeti / preh. trpeti bolečine
2. 2. preh. biti deležen kakega negativnega, neugodnega telesnega, gmotnega stanja: trpeti lakoto, pomanjkanje, revščino
3. 3. biti deležen neugodnega družbenega položaja: trpeti pod tujo oblastjo; stoletja so trpeli v suženjstvu
   // biti deležen česa negativnega, neugodnega sploh: trpeti izgubo, škodo; trpeti krivico; dolgo je trpela zasmehovanje / star. stroške trpi lastnik sam plača, poravna

zadržati misel, kadar ta visi na konici jezika in vrešči, da se bo ravnokar zavihtela proti sogovorniku, je "trpljenje". in kadar se misel izmuzne potrditvi, da sme zbežati proti ušesom sogovornika, je lahko prepozno. podobno kot zamujena priložnost, se tudi izgovorjena beseda "ne vrne nobena". pa smo spet tam - male sive celice sprejmejo, predelajo in ustvarijo vtis/odtis/pečat. eden čarov pogovora je tudi ta, da lahko svoje izrečene misli razlagamo in utemeljujemo v nedogled. če le imamo sogovornika. 
ni vedno lahko, držati jezik za zobmi, ko ti nešteto svežih misli skače po glavi in kriči Zdaj! Zdaj! Zdaj!

kar lepo v vrsto, ena po ena ... 

*Pain

"čisto enostavno je!", je vedno trdila. zvedavih oči sem sledila gibom njenih rok in si le stežka predstavljala, kako bi se obnašale moje roke z moko ... danes vedno mesiva skupaj. 
 nasmiham se spominom. nasmiham se hlebčku, ki vzhaja ob peči. nasmiham se vonju iz peči, diši skoraj kot takrat.
 in kako je Babi vedla? 

The power of Mind is a hard thing to handle. 

tako lahko neham verjeti, da gre osel enkrat na led. ko usmeriš misli in trud v zastavljen cilj, le redko uspeš ob prvem poizkusu. držiš se Pavčkovega "vnovič, in zopet, in znova.", ker ima prav. ko prepiham misli se ustrašim, da misli o neuspehu ne prinesejo uspeha. če verjamem v okusen kruhek, bom testo med prsti gnetla s pravim občutkom, hleb bo vzhajal na toplem, pri zaprtih vratih, in peč bo ravno prav vroča. vse jasno. ampak! kako naj nekaj tako fizikalnega kot je peč primerjam z nečim tako ne-samo-fizikalnim, kot je oseba? peč lahko jaz pripravim za kruh, osebe ne gre "pripraviti na osebo"?  oddahnem si, globoko vdihnem in se pomirim. vse je uredu in kot mora biti. "danes mislim samo pozitivne misli..." (DD)
  Babi je nič-kolikokrat odmerila moko, sol, vodo, kvas. nič-kolikokrat je testo žvižgalo med njenimi zgubanimi rokami. in nič-kolikokrat je imel njen kruh božanski okus. po letih izkušenj je vedno bolj zaupala občutku. ko otrok preizkuša moč svojih nog za prve korake, gotovo ni prepričan , da mu bo uspelo prehoditi pot med mamo in očetom. vendar poizkusi, vnovič in zopet in znova. ko nekoga na novo spoznaš, nisi prepričan, da si spoznal sogovornika, vendar poizkusiš. in dokler nič-kolikokrat ne poizkusiš, ne moreš enostavno zaupati. 

Quote-fishin #31

Odpri raje Srce namesto oči. Že MaliPrinc ve, da je bistvo očem skrito. 

 

1 na 1

čas. pa naj bo, če so nam ga odmerili. pa naj bo, če si je Duša izbrala šape s črnimi kremplji in košat Rep. če bi dovolila, bi ji položila glavo na trebuh, ko leži na travi, in lovila njen ritem dihanja. če bi dovolila, bi jo objela pod vratom, z drugo roko pod repom, dvignila in odnesla preko struge deroče vode. če bi dovolila… tako pa kot pogumen otrok, ki prvič pelje kolo brez pomožnih koles, vztraja, da lahko sama pripelje do zadnjega drevesa v ulici. čeprav živec kdaj uščipne, sama skoči v avto. čeprav bi se lahko pocrkljala, se umakne kot najstnik, kadar ga mama poljubi na čelo v družbi njegovih prijateljev. tukaj in zdaj me Rep vedno znova opominja na čare brezpogojne Ljubezni. dlje kot 11 let njenega življenja sem poslušala pripombe o smotrnosti najinih potepov – morda imaš bolj pomembno delo, morda je kaj drugega, bolj smiselnega za opravit… v moji glavi pa drugega smisla kot 1 na 1 med šumečimi listi in pisanimi krošnjami ni bilo najti. kot za vsako drugo izkušnjo v življenju, velja tudi za Rep – ne zaveš se, kaj lahko zamujaš, dokler ne izkusiš.

kakor smo si različni ljudje, vsaj tako so si med seboj različni Kralji Živali. najina Pot ima isto smer odkar je kot zadnji mladič v leglu in kot Princeza v mojih očeh skrivala rep med noge. danes dvigne glavo na drugimi ob prvem stiku in odločno pomaha z repom. navdihuje me, kako zelo živa je. kako zelo se ji iskrijo oči, ko pridržim ovratnico pred smrčkom. kako zelo močno zasadi kremplje v mojo dlan, ko mi poda šapo. kako zelo odločno tišči glavo v posodo, dokler ne izgine sled za zadnjo kapljo mleka. kako zelo hiti goltati nekaj smrdljivega, ko jo kličem sredi travnika. kako zelo moja je … ko jaz potisnem nos v njeno dlako in globoko vdihnem.

tukaj in zdaj. 

Quote-fishin #30

If there are past and future Lives, my Soul must be very young and unexperienced. No matter the bottom it hits, it always finds the strength to keep on traveling.  

pssst!

kot že mnogokrat poprej, se tudi sedaj začetni verz Desiderate najbolj usede nekam...

Spokojen hodi skozi trušč in naglico sveta, in se spominjaj miru, ki ga najdeš le v tišini. 

in je zares neopisljivo čudovit občutek, ko ničesar ne slišiš. Ronny je izstopila iz avta in potiho zaklicala "Wait, wait. Just listen to this....Nothing." kako nekdo, ki obišče to milino naše male deželice veliko bolj ceni drobne reči, ki so pravzaprav zelo velike. opazovati zvezde na nebu, saj ozračja ne kali svetloba javne razsvetljave. bujenje s petjem ptic, saj hišo obdajajo veje dreves, kjer imajo mali perutničarji dovolj prostora za jutranje vragolije. zajtrk na vrtu z razgledom na hribe, saj se za vsakim vogalom razteza kak "julijc" ali "kamniško-savinjc". po slabi uri vožnje si naročimo kavo na obali in se lahko odločimo še za čofotanje v hladnem jezeru, saj je Raj le en raztezaj stran.
tukaj, zdaj, zavedno. ne za vedno, zavedno. morda zavestno. kakorkoli...

ko se razvname debata z Goljatom, nama jezika zaveže tišina, ki naju je objela. hihitava se, ker je to eden tistih večerov, ko sosedje ne jedo mesa. in se nadejava, da se večeri kmalu ohladijo in bo vztrajnih tatov tišine vedno manj.

In če to veš ali ne, vse v vesolju poteka natanko tako, kot je prav. 

ko zapišem Life is a funny thing,  je to gotovo ponovitev št. N. nisem ne prva ne zadnja, ki to natipka, niti niso moje besede. raziskave kažejo, da naj bi .... šalo na stran - najverjetneje sem le gostitelj Popotnika, ki hrepeni po izkustvu, in se bo ob zadnjem vdihu oziral po naselitvi v novo obliko Življenja. na trenutke postaja že kar smešno, da naključja ne obstajajo. kot da si se uzrl v Nebo, zakričal "Zakaj?!?", spustil pogled in po cesti se pripelje odgovor na tvoje vprašanje. čeprav Goljat trdi, da je lahko odgovor na tovrstno vprašanje večplasten in vseobsegajoč, se zdi, da je Vesolje nagnjeno k kratkim in jedrnatim. And so it is, just like you said it would be (Damien Rice) je odzvanjala v glavi in se vedno glasneje smejala.

kadar si položiš prst na ustnice in prisluhneš, lahko slišiš marsikaj. tudi krike lastnih misli.

Bodi pozoren. Bodi srečen. 

Quote-fishin #29

Ne umri prazen. 

Umri star. 

To je cilj Življenja. 

Razočaraj svoj grob. 

M. Munroe 

 

 

 

( gypsy )

when your Heart feels fullfilled, but yet it does not rest on a shelf or in someones hands, cause it is in our Human nature to keep lookin (using the exact words from a good friend of mine) for more and better ... one could consider himself as a nomadic or free-spirited person.

Depending upon the circumstances, a gypsy may retain his nomadic habit of life even though he is not travelling for the time being.

well explained by uncle google. little girls with messy hair and torn dresses that were never clean were called for gypsies-children. grandmas would frighten them with tales about gypsies stealing dirty little girls, to take them along on a big journey and never return them back to their parents. 
I guess good parents show their kids the value of their ancestors, the roots of their family, so they never forget where they came from. and the birds can always return to their nests - repair a bit the old one and make a comfortable place for the next generation. withby the circle of Life keeps runin. and indeed, there is no need for eternity. at least not on this planet, in this galaxy (if there is indeed something worth prooving about a Life out there...)
to live and breathe always somewhere else is an inspiration to some, agony to others. two of us are not alike, nor are the beautiful red apples in the store. the one with a funny shape will taste as good as the perfect symetric apple. with a sence of biology we can say it is biodiversity and how one organism can adjust to the enviroment. 
a few centuries ago you had to be some kind of a nomad to ask yourself about the endless horizon at the end of your view point. or you trusted words that have been told to you - as far as we can see, there is the end of the world.

and there was more of land to settle on. maybe cats have similar ideas - Gin crossed my way to work and today he gently but loudly purrs close to my legs. if he's a real gypsy, our ways will no longer cross. he would go make other lives orange. 

do we keep on lookin till the very last breath? how many of us, so to say, the most intelligent creatures on Earth, get to listen closely to our instinct, desires, dreams... gypsies focus on their basic needs. water, food, takin care of eachother, and some good chocolate :) 

i guess i often come across with a bad hair-day, barefoot feet and dirty clothes. and one shouldn't admit how traveling adds some more bright lights on your painting of Life!

pristno

ko ti ljuba oseba reče, da bodi raje tiho in se ne vmešavaj, te zaskeli. baje zaskeli ego. baje.
gotovo pa si želiš poguma sam storiti isto, ko se ti takšna misel spusti nekje s čela proti jeziku.
baje se s previdnostjo lažje preživi v svetu odraslih. ne spodobi se vedno povedati, kaj si zares misliš in o čem zares premišljuješ. drži, da ne živimo vsi v urbanem okolju in se tudi družbeni kriteriji glede na lokacijo malo prilagodijo. pa vendar... baje se ne spodobi na glas smejati niti na ulici plesati. verjetno se ne spodobi niti kot otrok navdušeno vzklikati in se med sestankom hihitati.

je čas, in je čas. 

pomisli, koliko ljudi te obdaja, ki ti namenijo iskrene misli? koliko staršev dovoli otroku postati tisto, o čemer sanjajo? ali pa, koliko junakov in herojev je na njihovi poti uspeha spremljala podpora bližnjih? junaki so čudaki in heroji so dvoji - pokopani ali zglancani.

znaš pohvaliti? znaš dati drugemu priznanje premoči? razmišljam, kdo nas tega nauči. zares ni nobene znanstvene osnove za temi besedami, ampak okolje vpliva na osebnost. mladika, ki je sicer korenine že globoko potisnila v hladno zemljo, se bo ob slabših vremenskih pogojih okrepila v deblu in ob naslednji vremenski ujmi brez zadržkov sprejela v zavetje še mladega lisjaka ali pa dva srnjaka. otrok, kateremu ne polagamo besed v usta, se bo sam potrudil izgovoriti misli? verjamem, da.

manjkajo....manjkajo ljudje, ki brez dlake na jeziku z odločnim pogledom globoko v oči priznajo, da razmišljajo drugače kakor ti. manjkajo tisti, ki drugega potrepljajo po rami in pohvalijo. manjkajo tisti, ki opazijo. in manjkamo mi, ki zbiramo pogum postati boljši.

alone - ness

should anyone brag about thoughts bein build up in a foreign language, so be it. i couldn`t agree less with a thought that i am doing something wrong. so be it.
  a big part of my teen age was spent in the woods. actually, this came across my mind just recently. the awareness. i got home from school, primary or high, tried hard to finish my homework and study soon enough to be able to go out with my dog soon. if not sooner, at least before time of her supper, so she always ate on time. and the homework could wait, and i loved studyin in the night hours, when everyone else in the house went to bed. we met so many trees, so many branches, discovered so many holes in the ground. even better - on hot summer days i looked for those in the tree-trunks - if we were lucky they were filled up with rain water, she loves to drink from it. it could all sound like an ode to my dog, which she would without a doubt deserve, but is not. she is by far my favourite, though. just today my brother mentioned, in a rethorical question that remained unanswered- what will it be, when she is gone.
i made almost all this afternoon walks alone. alone, with my dog. even more i prefered those late at night, when i finished studyin, just before i went to bed, to let the cold breeze blow between my ears and cool off the strugglin mind. whenever i left abroad, i missed it like crazy, the alone walks. so i wandered the unknown streets and woods sometimes. went for a run. but felt weird, strange, unknown. lookin for a replacement.
if possible, i left my phone on my table. it felt free. and i miss it. i cant discuss the right from wrong about spending all this time alone, but for me it was not just right. for me it is time of free mind. often when i get back, or when i come closer to home, it hits my head that i havent been thinkin about one single thing. it just cleared out my mind. beautiful. with time i got more and more engaged with obligations and i put other priorities. with time spent abroad i grew a state in my mind that i dont have to do everything every day. that there are things that could be done by other people with the same dedication, same love and same care. but the alone walks are to be done by me. me and my dog.
 
relationships are still the most imporant thing in my life. if so, why am i not engaged in a serious one? why am i not madly truly deeply inlove with mister right? why am i not planing a morgage for our house we will soon build? why are we not makin baby plans? "you know, time flies..." just heard a quote in a movie, goes like "Life is a series of moments. The aim is to gather the most beautiful ones."
no matter the status, i do believe happiness comes from ones inside. it originates from ourselves. can one alone be happy? yes. no serious doubt about it. and no serious doubt about the fact, that happiness doubles when it is shared. i can not help but corellate with the animal kingdom - the majority of species lives in herds, groups or flocks. we build communities - starting from a pair of two lovin human beings reachin out to a greater bigger society. so, one is actually never alone. unless one insists on it. some people are just better of alone, by their own choices.

i choose to be happy. i choose love. i choose a smile. i choose to share it with you. i choose.
   the first time i was forced to think about me alone, it was the most heartbraking thing i felt. i was scared of the unknown. it was the most selfish thing of me to do, to think about alone. i still believe, though, there is never a complete alone. never ever for no one. and beliefs are quite a tricky thing!

royal loyalty

ko med razporejenimi artikli iščem izvirno darilo, se mi pogled ustavi na prepletenih nitih, vpetih v krog. lovilec sanj t.i. "dream-catcher". s prsti tipam mehkobo perja, ki se nežno premika s tokom zraka. vprašam se, kaj sem sanjala danes? redko se mi zgodi, da bi se sanj zavedala. še redkeje pa, da bi me sanje prebudile. morda se zato večkrat počutim ujeta v že doživetem trenutku; vsaj zdi se tako. kot da bi me nekdo dregnil pod rebri, me prešine - "hej, pa to sem že videl, to sem že doživel!" (VK). če imam čas, si razbijam glavo s kaj in kako je to možno, največkrat se le nasmehnem in hitim naprej. zadovoljna, da se moje skromno mnenje o naključjih potrjuje v vsakdanjem življenju. 
Tabornik me je ujel za besedo, ko sva debatirala ravno o tem - če ni naključij, ima nekdo/nekaj načrt? ne vem, ampak razmišljam. svojeglavo in trmasto iščem odgovore na že neštetokrat zastavljena vprašanja... 

Dare to dream.

kadar me potepuška slutnja pelje po katerem od večjih mest, si vzamem čas za ljudi. jih opazujem s klopce ali pa vsaj s kotičkom očesa spremljam njihov korak. toliko obrazov in za vsakim od teh gotovo več kot le ena zgodba! glede na videno si pripovedujem zgodbo kar sama, in se vprašam, kje je moja. kje so moje sanje? zakaj se jih ne spominjam vsako jutro? 
fizikalni vztrajnostni moment se je verjetno pretvoril v miselnega, da sem danes, kjer sem. popisana z živo paleto barv in odtenkov ljudi, ki me v življenju dopolnjujejo. in ne, barv ni nikoli preveč - želim si še kakšne! ;) 

Dance while you`re young. 

če dvignem pogled izza platnic svoje poti, oči ujamejo kričeča opozorila družbe - spoznajte sebe, bodite zvesti samemu sebi, vedno pomisli sprva nase ... 
in iščem naprej ... 

Quote-fishing #28

"You were always saying, emotions are overrated. But you were wrong. They are all we've got!" 

Film Youth

Quote-fishing #27

Life  without   love  is  like  ship  without  sails. 

po-polno

prav nič na tem Planetu ni samo sebi dovolj, samo sebi namen ali samo sebi izpopolnjen pomen.
tiste male reči zares štejejo. in potem vsaka zase in skupaj sestavljajo čudovite dni. male, nasmeška vredne reči.
Življenje je lahko ustaljena tirnica. v glavnem je Življenje ustaljena tirnica. držim se preverjene Poti in sem srečna. ravno tam, ko Pot malo zavije s tirov!

družba nam hote ali nehote postavlja visoka pričakovanja. ustrašim se otroka, ki se prijatelju opraviči, da ne utegne igrati košarke, ker je ravno utrujen prišel iz glasbene šole in ga zvečer čaka še ura francoščine. ustrašim se staršev, ki svojih otrok ne pustijo skakati po lužah in pojesti pesti blata na vrtu. dobro, pretiravam malo, ampak zares ne. ni prave Poti, niti prave smeri, in še manj pravega načina. kdo sem jaz, Človek, da bi sodila o prav in narobe? 

samo to.

ni veliko reči, ki bi jih kar povedali tako, brez zadržkov. okus kave ali izbira oblek, da, to že. občutek, ki te prevzame, ko te poboža prvi sončni žarek ali objame roka prijatelja, pa večini ostane skrit. bognedaj, neznan. 

in tako se izgubi čar. od otroškega navdušenega krika ob rojstnodnevni torti do na videz odraslega in premišljeno zadržanega vzdiha ob novici o rojstvu prijateljevega prvega otroka. zares ne mislim, da nas je do sem pripeljala evolucija. zares mislim, da smo po naravi večne nabiralke in večni lovci. 

z željo po obstoju in preživetju se vsak bori po svoje. žal ima cona udobja sila debelo skorjo, težko prebadljivo. učim se korakov sveta odraslih, čeprav naj bi zastopala vrste že skoraj desetletje. slej-ko-prej te dohiti. večkrat bi si želela na dan priklicati otroka v sebi, da bi se lahko manj premišljeno odločala. da bi večkrat le stekla bosih nog preko sosedovega vrta k češnjam vikendašev in si napolnila žepe z najslajšimi. ugasnem glasbo in prisluhnem svojim mislim. 

svodoba. ljubezen. iskreno. 

zares mislim. zares verjamem. predati se pišu lahnega poletnega vetriča in se zavedati lepote trenutka. uživati poljub nežnih ustnic in prepletati prste najljubših dlani. iztegniti roke proti otroku, ki ti teče v objem in ga dvigniti v nebo. poslušati zgodbo prijateljice o načrtih za njeno sanjsko poroko. točiti krokodilje solze razočaranja in se smejati na ves glas od navdušenja. opravljati sanjski poklic, ki te osrečuje, izpopolnjuje in, navsezadnje, preživlja. kdo je tukaj Srečko?